When I’m working with my incredible clients, the hardest part about letting go of an item is deciding whether it stays or goes. Part of my job is to guide them through the process of self-reflection:
Is this something that I will want to have someday?
Does it no longer have real and meaningful purpose in my home?
Is it ready to be gifted, sold, or even tossed in the trash?
But what about the regrets that come with letting go? I started reflecting on any regrets I might have in my own home. Naturally, that helped me come to a decision for last week’s podcast episode: Season 2, Episode 3 - Decluttering with ADHD: Will Letting Go Ever Feel Easy?
Honestly, I can’t say it fully does get easier. But I am still on the journey.
What I can say is that I now approach the decision with more confidence, knowing what it looks and feels like once it’s behind me. I can look at the item and confidently say it no longer belongs in my life, I trust I could replace it in the future if needed, and yet, I’ll still feel a bit emotional when saying goodbye.
When Sentimental Attachments Surprise You
I donated my daughter’s soft and sweet baby blanket. I remember dropping off the donations that day and seeing it sitting on the top of the pile of items. As we were pulling away, I felt a little nudge at my stomach as I felt guilty for letting it go. Pro-tip: Putting your items in a black bag can help prevent those emotional tugs at the heartstrings (thanks, Dana K White).
Then, My 5 year old started crying as if I had just put our dog down. The nudge I felt in my belly turned into a full ache as anxiety flooded my entire body. She saw the blanket. Immediately, I started feeling like a terrible mom for letting go of something she clearly cared about more than I had realized. The flood of emotion was so real that I started bawling.
After a few moments of me trying to console our daughter and my husband trying to console me, we asked some more questions. Cora thought we were getting rid of a blanket we had just gotten for her and her sister at Costco. Once we cleared up the misunderstanding, she was perfectly fine.
But I wasn’t!
Now I had to sit with the fact that I had this visceral reaction of letting go of a baby blanket, and it was now only my cross to bear. I was flabbergasted that my husband wasn’t trying to change my mind or that Cora’s reaction didn’t make us rush back into that donation center for me to climb up the pile of items to retrieve it.
The Power of Moving Forward Without Regret
It is here that I tell you over a year later with the utmost confidence that I do not regret it.
I asked myself during the podcast episode, Do I regret this? Nope.
And as I write this blog post, I ask myself again, Do I regret this? Nope.
Most of the time, when I am making these decisions, as soon as the choice is made, I never think of the item ever again. Seriously, my working memory is not great! So yes, I remember this one incident and the feelings it gave me because in the end, I have given myself the great gift of all: Peace and ease in my home with so much less to manage.
I also reassure myself at the end of the day:
I'm a great mom who has given so much to my girls in the form of love.
My children have videos and pictures they can look back on they can treasure.
There is nothing in this world I can’t handle.
Every item in your home represents a decision waiting to be made—what’s for dinner, what to wear, and so on. But how many decisions pile up before you arrive at an answer? When you reduce the decisions, you also reduce the mental fatigue that comes with them.
The reality is that there's no shortage of reasons to avoid decision-making when it comes to sentimental items. The Challenge, should you accept it: what if you started looking for reasons to let it go instead?
Need help letting go? Book a call to work virtually with me here.
Looking for a supportive community of like-minded folks committed to decluttering their homes and minds?
About The Author:
Megs from the Organizing an ADHD Brain podcast brings a refreshing and relatable approach to organizing, specifically tailored for those with ADHD. She combines practical tips with empathy, helping listeners understand how to create systems that work for their unique brains while minimizing overwhelm and maximizing productivity.
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